I can't sleep

I am in a state where I know that i want to sleep but that there are so many thoughts that are running through my head that I cannot seem to let go of. I need to manifest them in another form and i think that this entry would just be it.

Today, I went to IHMC to have band practice with Euphonia and our friend judy. At first we were a bit tense considering the fact that we were put under time constraint and once again that we are cramming the next band guest performance for the 28th. When we went on practicing however, we became more comfortable and we were having fun.

Its like it was a snippet of being in highschool all over again! I have to admit i miss highschool. I never thought that i really would. These people become part of your blood. A part of you.

Its great that in highschool people manage to know each other very well.... and they make an effort to do so. i think it has something to do with people being young and adventurous when at that age. When people grow up they become involved witht their egos and fears and become afraid to reveal themsleves sometimes.

So I have noticed that even people you know are afraid of meeting other people...

Its just a matter of being out there.Anyway, today.. (since its 1:40 am na) is also my quartet/band's anniversary. We have been together for a year and we are still rockin on! I am so happy that we have kept our ties.... we are still whole up till now. I hope we will be for a long time....

I am getting sleepy night!

Voices

It is just quite difficult to distinguish the difference between your intuition and your mind. The voices sound the same, in the same intonation.

They do say however that your intuition is the first one that tells you to do something without hesitation. They also say that your mind is the one who contradicts that and tells you to do otherwise making you deviate from yourfirst thought. But, what if your minds messages of anxieties was your intuition as well?

Oh life! Sometimes i just want to start anew. Whenever I get into these trifle dilemmas i want to repeat this lifetime with a whole new beginning.

I guess that going through your everday troubles just means having guts. One has to be strong enough to face what lies beyond what you cannot see from your own perspective right now.

Your mind is equal to fear. Sometimes one has to be fearless and fierce, sometimes one has to be wary. small glimpses of fear is not always bad, it makes you think of the worst case scenario. It makes your whole self be prepared for anything. One cannot say what is possible to happen since so many identities are being sculpted at the moment of now.

Waddling and absorbing fear, however, can cause your whole life to alter. People tend to stay stuck in their comfort zones refusing to budge with much conviction
I would rather live my life ou tto the fulest whatever happens. I have to stop making my heart beat so fast at the thought of death. I have to look at its core and burst out laughing at the sight of it. The irony is that everyone will die anyway at their chosen times and as of now i am alive. I choose to be. :D